My day has been SHIT. My almost every day is shit. School days especially. It was all going somewhat okay until I started getting ready for school. I was thinking about skipping washing hair today because I wouldn’t quite have time for it and making a hairstyle with some hairspray instead. So I quickly took a shower, quickly got dressed, quickly put books in the bag. And then, I paused. I got some 5-10 mins until I have to leave. What do I have time for? I put few more things in my bag, put on shoes, thinking I’ll put on a jacket and do my hair on my way out (since the bathroom is RIGHT THERE on the way out).

AND THEN!! I tried on a jacket. Neeh I don’t like how it fits me on these shoes. I try another one, then another.. Long story short I have at least 15 different jackets and coats (some of ’em is mum’s), and almost all of them ended up on the floor or on my bed. Just all over the room. And that seems to be happening every day only with other kind of clothes.

I didn’t like any of the options, and if I did, its too cold outside for more than half of the collection.

So then I started freaking out and being angry because more than 10 minutes have passed and I’m being late. I hadn’t had my hair done, no make up in addition to horrible greasy hairstyle and no matching jacket to my boring outfit. That is my point of breaking when I wish to take everything off of me, start crying/screaming and start over. It sounds so scary now that I realize how many times I’ve actually been in this situation.

Wanna hear the worst part? I got some yucky green jacket on the different shade of green shirt I got.. A total failure.. Why don’t I simply every day wear black? Anyway, I ran out, made it to the last possible ride I could catch not to be extremely late, and sat down. So angry, so pissed, so full of this energy that badly needs to be let out. And what I usually do at this point is take my earphones out and on the loudest volume listening to some angry ass dubstep or some screaming metal which takes the anger out of me, and by the time I’m at school I be okay. BUT I’VE FORGOTTEN THE DAMN EARPHONES IN OTHER JACKET. So many screaming teenagers, cursing and yelling out the dumbest things, I so badly had a wish to get up and scream at them to calm the fuck down, and that’s clearly how you see when someone isn’t raised well. Or has no manners. God damn people, I am ashamed of my own generation. I swear to God I am ashamed.

So I calmed down by now, writing helped a bit, I guess.

But anyway, I’m getting out now, I have 5 minutes to get to school. Wish me luck.